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I wrote this story using some old stories I have heard over the years. One day I combined them with a story line and came up with the following. Many of my friends told me I should publish it. I like (clean) jokes, and I like to write. So, here is my little story. I hope you will enjoy it.

The Grand Adventures of
Ida and Liz

Two elderly women (Ida and Liz) were out driving in a large car - both could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red, but they just went on through.

The Liz (in the passenger seat) thought to herself, “I must be losing it. I could have sworn we just went through a red light.”

After a few more minutes, they came to another intersection and the light was red again. Again, they went right through. Liz was almost sure that the light had been red but was really concerned that she was losing it. She was getting nervous.

At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was red and they went on through. So, she turned to the Ida and said, “Ida, did you know that we just ran through three red lights in a row? You could have killed us both!” Ida turned to Liz and said, “Oh, crap! Am I driving?”

Well they finally got to their destination. The two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years, they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to going to tea rooms a few times a week, and to playing cards. This day, they had gone to tea. After being there a while Liz looked at Ida and said, “Now don't get mad at me. I know we've been friends for a long time, but I just can't think of your name! I've thought and thought, but I can't remember it. Please tell me what your name is.”

Well Ida just glared at her. For at least three minutes she just stared and glared at her. Finally she said, “How soon do you need to know?”

Anyway, before they could head home Liz thought she had to call 911 on her cell phone to report that the car has been broken into. She was hysterical as she explains the situation to the dispatcher: 'They've stolen the stereo, the steering wheel, the brake pedal and even the accelerator' she cried! The dispatcher said, “Stay calm. An officer is on the way.” A few minutes later, the officer radios in. “Disregard,” he says. “She got in the back-seat by mistake.”
Ok so they started to head home with Liz driving this time. As she was driving down the freeway the car phone rang. Answering, she heard her grandson’s voice urgently warning her, “Grandma-Liz, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Interstate 77. Please be careful!' “Heck baby boy, said Liz, It's not just one car. It's hundreds of them!” And so it goes.

Read more articles by: Bailey StJames